Centreville, VA Female - 24 Years Old | Hey folks! Just want to preface before I begin, that this will be a long post. So if you're willing to read it, awesome. If you're going to TL;DR it - I won't be giving a shortened version. Too bad.
I need some advice.
I am the Maid of Honor for my best friend's wedding, which will be held next December. I have already had a discussion with the bride in regards to what she'd like to do for her bachelorette party. She decided on a short cruise, which will run each attendant (6 of us total) roughly $200 + extra money for alcohol and other fun stuff on the cruise. I do not believe this is an unreasonable amount of money, and 3 of the other 4 bridesmaids are on board (haha, punny) with the idea.
The remaining bridesmaid is campaigning her hardest to change those plans. She got married last year, and as one of her bridesmaids, I shelled out the cash to fly to FL from DC twice (once in preparation, once for the wedding), bought my dress, and spent alot of time helping her prepare for her day. WHICH, I may add, is a duty you accept as a member of the bridal party. She chose not to have a bachelorette party, birdal shower, had maybe 20 people at the wedding, did everything last minute - was very frustrating, but she didn't really care or have any expectations about the day. Parents made the food, cheap photographer (only hired for an hour). Her wedding, her choice.
She is giving many excuses for not wanting a cruise - her and her husband have yet to go on a honey moon and she wants to go on a cruise with him before anyone else; it should be a bacheloretter party, not a bachelorette vacation; she has her husband's feelings to respect about such a trip, she does not have the money (16 months away, really? Also, she's 23 and has never had a job and not ever applied herself to anything); she hates the idea in general.
She is being very selfish, which the bride is complaining to me about - it was her idea, its what SHE WANTS as the BRIDE. And I have to agree. The bridesmaid has blocked me on Facebook, which sucks because we have been friends for years. I sent her a long message to which she replied last night, but I'll only include that if someone is interested. Essentially told her to stop being selfish, and by accepting the invitation of being a bridesmaid, you accept the costs of time and money as well. I'm not being controlling about it, I'm just trying to make my friend's special time memorable and fun - and as stress-free as possible
I guess I'd like to know how I should deal with this. My mother seems to think she's in the right. However, everyone else I've spoken to is on my and the bride's side. Thoughts? Opinions? How do these things work? Thanks in advance :) |
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. I personally think it's reasonable to want to go on a trip with your husband before them, considering she never had a honeymoon.