You don't have to get over it, she does. If she knows you've stopped and are trying to be better, and she has accepted an apology from you, then that is in the past. She should not be bringing up past arguments or problems in new ones. The issue of you lying has been dealt with right? Her bringing it up is being childish. Now obviously she's going to be a little doubting of your trust, but that takes time to build up. Talk to her, tell you that you are no longer doing that and that you feel really bad about it. Tell her if you haven't already. If you genuinely feel bad about it, tell her that and that it makes you feel bad when she brings it up and she should understand and not bring it up any more. Good luck!
I agree that to keep bringing it up after the fact is ridiculous. Everyone I've talked to (including my thearapist) says it does more damage than good.
Sometimes the damage is done and cant be repaired. As ive gotten older ive learned that forgiveness is an amazing thing but it takes alot for one person to be able to do. It seems like you did not cheat on her, at least with another person. Everyone slips up whether it be drinking/smoking etc. I would say just keep staying on the right path. As long as your doing the right thing then thats all you can do. You cant change people and if time goes on and she still feels the same way. it might be time to cut the ties.
No cheating whatsoever. Just letting my older party life I led before I met her resurface.
Time is definitely the TRUE answer. I just hope we don't drive each other crazy in the process.
The guy answered you haha.
I don't know if age comes into play here. If it were his parents or something, it would factor in, but I would say most girls have a problem with guys who drink and smoke a lot. Which is why I only date girls who drink and smoke.
If she keeps bringing it up, she's not over it. I pulled the same shit with my ex. He fucked up once in our relationship and I decided to give him another chance. However, I would bring up what had happened a lot and tell him I didn't know if I could trust him over and over again. Ultimately, it led to our downfall. I have learned this -- If you decide to get back together with someone after they do something wrong to you, you can't bring it up over and over again. If you're deciding to live with the mistake, move on and stop bringing it up or it's never going to work out.
There's really nothing you can do to get her trust back, time helps. Even time apart might help for her evaluate if she REALLY can accept what happened with you two.
I strongly believe in letting a sleeping dog lie. The past cannot possibly be changed, whether that's a good or bad thing. It's something she struggles with more than I because ultimately I choose my actions. She seems to think I don't want to be reminded of the truth because I want to "forget about it". Obviously I have not forgotten, I just don't see what bringing it up and fighting about it accomplishes. It does way more harm than good. I already feel guilty, I don't need the added drama.
YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME FOR RESPONDING!! Thanks a ton.