she became very defensive and said stuff like how could i go through her personal stuff like that and that she was going to talk to me about it the next day because that had all happened that night. she says she doesnt think she can trust me anymore and doesnt know how i am going to come back from this. i apologized profusely and told her i should have put more thought into everything. she told me i should never had gone through her stuff and i should have just asked her about the one text i saw in the morning.
sounds to me like she is looking for a way out and you gave it to her, even though a small one she's taking it.. If youre a strong willed man, give her some space to get her head in the game. If she goes to the dude, then too bad, I doubt he's going to want anything more than to "experience her again." He probably won't leave his fiance for her. But if she does go to him, then you can look else where and never take her back.
Keep us posted, ya?