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03:55 AM on 02/28/13 
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fallfromgrace85
CephaLOVEpod
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Nashville, TN
Female - 25 Years Old
One of my roommates and I are in an argument, one of the reasons being that she believes it rude to ask permission to try a food (i.e. if she makes a chicken dish and leaves part of it in a skillet, she believes I should wait to be invited to try a piece of it, as its impolite to ask, "Oh, may I try a spinach, pepper, spoonful, etc?"). She has also "drawn her line" about the fact that she doesn't want others using her food/wants to buy her own, and is upset that the other morning I asked to use some of her milk when I had none of my own, and OFFERED to buy her some more that evening. In her eyes, disrespectful.

Coming from the girl who claims to be broke but shops on modcloth/etsy/etc.

I told her I refuse to apologize for confronting her about the situation.

Fantastic.

Thoughts on this? Am I the only one that was raised thinking it is polite to ask permission for things? (Also, I'm aware that asking to be invited somewhere is rude, but this is food - I'm not out at dinner asking to eat off of her plate or, more importantly, sticking a fork in with no warning).
05:49 AM on 02/28/13 
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a speedo model
an enthusiast
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Chicago, IL
Male - 27 Years Old
If you are asking for something from someone and they find it rude, why ask? It doesn't matter if you think it's rude or not, she does. Since you're asking for something, best not to offend.
05:57 AM on 02/28/13 
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suicidesaints
A Million F@$% Diamonds
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Dallas
Male - 30 Years Old
Sounds like your roommate is a bitch.

It's fine if she doesn't want you to have something, but there's nothing wrong with asking... especially in the milk situation.

I can understand her wanting to buy her own food and have her own things, and not wanting to share, but she should realize that being roommates sometimes entails sharing.

If you run out of milk and she can loan you a little until that evening when you replace it, she should have no reason no to, unless for some reason she's going to be using the milk before then, or for some reason she believes you won't replace it.

If I were you, I'd just get my own things and keep away from her
05:59 AM on 02/28/13 
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a speedo model
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Chicago, IL
Male - 27 Years Old
Sounds like your roommate is a bitch.

It's fine if she doesn't want you to have something, but there's nothing wrong with asking... especially in the milk situation.

I can understand her wanting to buy her own food and have her own things, and not wanting to share, but she should realize that being roommates sometimes entails sharing.

If you run out of milk and she can loan you a little until that evening when you replace it, she should have no reason no to, unless for some reason she's going to be using the milk before then, or for some reason she believes you won't replace it.

If I were you, I'd just get my own things and keep away from her
This is a good point. There really is no reason to refuse...
06:28 AM on 02/28/13 
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Amongster
Still On The Sand
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Illinois, USA
Genderqueer - 24 Years Old
Your roommate's concept of manners are kind of backward and she has no way of knowing you're interested in something in order to offer it to you.

There's never a reason not to shop on Etsy, though.
07:32 AM on 02/28/13 
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Spencer Control
Will you catch me if I blow away?
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While I'd definitely say you're in the right here, especially about the milk incident, it might be better just to let it slide, in the interest of having a tolerable roommate.
07:35 AM on 02/28/13 
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justsurrendrfan
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new york, NY
Male - 24 Years Old
Im gonna agree with you she's a little strange, especially with the milk situation, that's something easily replacea le and you offered to. As for her meals I can see that she wants it to herself and dosent want to share, that's a little different. For example if I made my favorite meal homemade chicken alfredo and I had some extra for tommorows lunch, knowing im broke I would save it for that. Then if a roommate asks for it, I might think its rude because I would feel awkward and probably give it away because im a nice guy even though I really wanted it, that would be rude.
08:03 AM on 02/28/13 
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WaveUponWave
Six days no sleep
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Ireland
Male - 27 Years Old
When you ask, she has no way of saying no without feeling like a bitch, so she feels forced to say yes, which she resents.
08:07 AM on 02/28/13 
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marieeboxx
Cat Lady
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West Coast
Female - 23 Years Old
I don't think it's "rude" to ask to try food. In my eyes, it's polite. Its not like you're just trying her food without asking. And idk why she's tripping over a little bit if milk. I think your roommate needs to get over herself. She sounds like she's the rude one.
08:40 AM on 02/28/13 
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XenoAbe
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Atlanta, Ga
Male - 29 Years Old
Step 1: Invite her to try your food.
Step 2: Sneak laxatives into it.
08:50 AM on 02/28/13 
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RyanPm40
Ryan
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NH
Male - 21 Years Old
Step 1: Invite her to try your food.
Step 2: Sneak laxatives into it.

09:55 AM on 02/28/13 
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suicidalmoose
Lindsay let me kiss your forehead!
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Lisboa, Portugal
Male - 27 Years Old
Im gonna agree with you she's a little strange, especially with the milk situation, that's something easily replacea le and you offered to. As for her meals I can see that she wants it to herself and dosent want to share, that's a little different. For example if I made my favorite meal homemade chicken alfredo and I had some extra for tommorows lunch, knowing im broke I would save it for that. Then if a roommate asks for it, I might think its rude because I would feel awkward and probably give it away because im a nice guy even though I really wanted it, that would be rude.

This.

The milk thing is kinda crazy, of course, but everyone has their own weird stuff and ideas. If the milk/food is the only problem about her, who gives a shit. Just let it slide, as someone already said.
10:19 AM on 02/28/13 
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fallfromgrace85
CephaLOVEpod
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Nashville, TN
Female - 25 Years Old
Im gonna agree with you she's a little strange, especially with the milk situation, that's something easily replacea le and you offered to. As for her meals I can see that she wants it to herself and dosent want to share, that's a little different. For example if I made my favorite meal homemade chicken alfredo and I had some extra for tommorows lunch, knowing im broke I would save it for that. Then if a roommate asks for it, I might think its rude because I would feel awkward and probably give it away because im a nice guy even though I really wanted it, that would be rude.

I have never once asked the girl for a full meal. Only, "oh, would you mind if I grabbed a pepper out f your skillet?" I told her she should have let me know instead of having it explode like it did. But it's nice knowing I wasn't raised different from everyone else out there.
10:33 AM on 02/28/13 
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upthepunx
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San Diego, CA
Male - 24 Years Old
girl fight
10:33 AM on 02/28/13 
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suicidesaints
A Million F@$% Diamonds
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Dallas
Male - 30 Years Old
If you only asked to taste something she made, then she should be flattered that you think her dish looks/smells good enough to want to taste it. If you asked for a full meal, then I could see where it might be awkward for her, and make her feel forced into saying yes... but it sounds like you haven't done that so...



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